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Take This 10 Minute Test

By Richard J. Loebl, LCSW, BCD

This ten-minute test will help you determine if your husband, boyfriend, or partner is a LATE Man – or if you are a LATE Man yourself. The LATE Men are adult men who are stuck at an adolescent level of development – they are Lost, Angry Teenagers.

Do you believe your husband or partner is a LATE Man?
Are you a LATE Man?

Take the quiz to find out.
Please answer “Yes” to each statement that applies:
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1. Self-sabotage: negative behavior destructive to marriage, family, or career. Irresponsible,
impulsive, and avoidant, including addictive behavior patterns.


2. Anger management issues, including aggressive and passive-aggressive behavior, and
cruelty toward others. May include bigotry, racism, and misogyny.


3. Emotional disconnection and confusion. Lack of emotional awareness or insight
(alexithymia), emotional distance from others, immature emotional reactions and
expression of feelings. Difficulties communicating feelings and needs.


4. Narcissism – self-absorbed, lack of empathy or compassion for others, grandiosity and
egotism. Also, narcissistic injury – exaggerated negative reactions to perceived or real
criticism or judgment by others; reactive to being held accountable by others; reactive to
limits set by other people; and reactive when his impossibly high needs for appreciation
are not met.


5. Excessive shame, self-doubt, and insecurity. Includes jealousy and envy toward others.
feels not good enough. Tendency to take on a victim mentality. Often accompanied by
depression and/or anxiety.


6. Sexually inappropriate behavior, including sexual harassment, sexual addictions,
excessive sexual demands on partners, sexual inhibitions, and/or sexually objectifying


7. Relationship distress: power based. Resulting from controlling or abusive behavior.


8. Relationship distress: passive type. Due to passive, dependent behavior; including
neglect, avoidance, distance, and shutting down. Socially immature and isolative


9. Physically self-destructive behavior includes poor diet, excessive alcohol use, smoking,
lack of exercise, ignoring health problems, and avoids seeing doctors.


10. Obsessive and extreme behavior patterns. Such as workaholism, excessive risk taking
behavior (driving recklessly; risky investments; etc.), self-injurious sports activities (may
also include the use of performance enhancing drugs), refusal to follow rules, and
physical aggression.


Question 1 of 10

The LATE Men are adult men who function like Lost, Angry Teenagers. These men are emotionally and behaviorally immature. Like teenagers, they are late to show up – late to mature, and late to make or keep commitments. They tend to self-sabotage, causing relationship distress and problems at work and at home. They typically grew up in dysfunctional families, resulting in identity confusion, anger management problems, and emotional distress.

These descriptions possibly indicate significant emotional, behavioral and relational problems. That’s why even only one checkmark should be taken seriously. If you know a LATE Man, or if you believe you fit this profile, please contact us today. Counseling for men who struggle with these issues is highly effective.

The LATE Men I’ve worked with over the years report that their lives and relationships are much improved as a result of therapy. I would be grateful to hear your feedback and answer any questions you may have.